hi friend.
DB is scrapping the bottom of the barrel for advice on the situation. Real friends would be better.
IN leu of that however, sounds like the end is near for you. In my exp when a girl gets distance, short , basically how you described it she wants it to end but is too chicken shit to outright do it hersuelf so she tortures you into doing it.
Life is great, so is love but it can be painful. I ASSURE YOU, that time heals all, and nothing makes you forget about a girl faster then completely deleting everything about her (no lets be friends shit) and getting a new one.
Personal story, Had long term gf 4 years, loved her. Had to go long distance for two months, over that two month period it was rough, first visit to her found out she was getting ready to cheat on me. IT hurt real bad and I didn't think I'd ever get over it. Fast forward 6 years later and I've got a fiancee who is 340000 TIMES BETTER THEN THAT BITCH.
It sucks dude, but you'll find a new one. Shit online dating is so easy you can actually find someone who cares all your hobbies with (DOTA for example, but please have more hobbies then video games)
In a friends with benefits situation, one person will always get attached eventually, it is as probably as the coast will erode the shoreline.
Give her your ultimatum, she doesn't want to do it, cut her out, completely.
Good luck.
I don't think anyone can give you a good answer to your situation. My opinion would be to let her go and invest time into a person that has mutual feelings to you, even tough you won't find the person fast. Another person surely has another opinion and so on :). You have to decide on what to do. Just enjoy your youth, there's no use on spending it like that.
> Although there is some shitty guy she sticks too a lot during college hours(because the groups were formed so), she would barely get time for me except texts(This shit hurts a lot)
Dude this is pathetic
My fucking god
and I am not being hateful. I am giving you some tough love here. Man up. Cut all contact with this girl. You cant "just" be friends with her if you have fellings for her.
This is black and white advice that I wish someone had gave me before. Cut all contact.
Quit wasting time and energy on this. Focus on career, personal betterment (working out, maturing, networking), and money.
There are literally thousands of girls out there who could be a potential mate.
Plenty of fish in the sea mate, if she friend zoned then don't waste your time. She already knows how you feel and she took her decision. If you stick around you will probably get hurt more than what it hurts now. Sometimes things don't go the way we plan and we have to accept this.
If you can manage contact, then stay as friends, if you can't, then avoid her until you stop looking at her like you want something else, basically try to put her on the friend category.
I would have adviced you to fight for her, but she already told you that "relations are suffocating" and from what you describe you are stalled. Fighting for her will probably have no positive result under these conditions. You will waste time, effort, get even more attached and probably hurt you and maybe even her in the process.
I can guarantee you 100% that you will find someone better than her in the future. Good luck mate.
She is getting bored of you, because you give her no new enyojment. In this case either be seen or forgoten. Or if she is speaking differently that means either you did something that she didn't like or some 1 told her something about you that upset her.
Anyway if she hasn't pushed you fully away there still is chance, you just need to prove you are better and interested.
The answer is obvious. Your only Legend- You need to hit at least Divine 1 before she will talk to you again. Play DOTA till you hit divine 1 and ignore her until then. I gurantee your problem will go away. Either that or snowball into a now diagnosable thing idiots like to call depression.
Shit just cut her off, no reason to stay for a girl that can’t get with you, burden on your shoulders. You’ll be fine after a couple weeks
You got 2 choices mate:
1) Either just forget about her and most importantly STOP TEXTING HER. Girls need attention, remove that away from them theyll go crazy. So you should either expect her texting you a lot (after you stop texting her for a while) or expect nothing at all. If nothing at all happens, then you made the right choice of forgetting her.
2) Man up, go to her FACE TO FACE, make a move, dont be a bitch and complain via texts. Tell her how you feel, and ask her if she feels the same way, if she responds by saying she wants to be just friends, laugh and tell her to lose your number and just walk away. Since she has a clue of how you feel towards her, this should be easy for you.
And some advise: I prefer the second option, less stress on you in the long term you wont be thinking about her a lot. Plus, if you make your move like as her for a date or some shit then ask her whether she cares about you, the bitch wont forget that moment for the rest of her life, and its college mate dont attach yourself to someone this early.
Again, most importantly from this day forward, STOP TEXTING THE BITCH.
must be difficult for you, if she really doesnt give a fuck about you... JUST move on.
Dont force your feelings on someone who doesnt like you
If you're in love with her, tell her.
If you just wanna be friends with her, then be her friend.
Otherwise I suggest just moving on completely.
I was in this situation not too long ago. Girl I liked for a while ended up just wanting to be friends while she was talking to this one douche guy. She is now dating the douche guy and I haven't talked to her in about 6 months. Best decision I've ever made because now I've moved on and started talking to other people.
stop being attached to her.
unless you find enjoyment in having urges to grab a knife and cut your stomach open before you go to bed every night
is making fun of me some kind of your new past time activity or where is this coming from all of sudden
Though story i felt same when my gf left me after 7months
Strangly after 6 months i completely forgot her ( we arent in same part of town nor school nor anything so it was faster to forget i think) and she was calling me atleast twice a yeaar last 4 years xD
I literarly forgot how she look now but first 4-6 months i wss rly fcked up
ok lets hear some facts here:
1: she doesnt see u as opposite sex or boyfriend material
2: she obviously likes some1 else
and here some of my thoughts
1: have some dignity and TRY to get over her
2: doesnt matter if u keep in touch with her but forget the thoughts that u might be together with her. U can keep friendship but be cold in other areas
3: be indifferent to her (i mean if she asks u a favor think 1st if u would do that for a male friend) if not dont do it for her as well
i could say some shit more but i feel my english are bad and dont give the feeling i want to so i ll stop here. Any decision is yours. Do what u believe
OP you sound like one of the typical "nice guys" we hear about but you're Just a creep. Stick to dota pls
Had a similar problem. Heres a tip, move on. I know it doesn't sound too appealing but trust me, find someone who will make you feel loved. and I guarantee you will wonder why you had to try so hard and you should just go for somebody who really likes you. don't be this girls backup.
Very well thank you everyone for trying to understand the situation and helping me out.
It's kinda difficult because we'll have to be in the same class for 2 more years.
But yeah I think yall are correct, maybe she isn't worth it and the biggest mistake we end up doing is being readily available for her.
Gonna be difficult but I'll try not to do any conversation with her.
One question: What if she tries to communicates? At that moment it is difficult to reply but at the same time equally difficult to not reply as well :(
If she wouldn't have been trying to communicate I would have stopped it long before.
Why do these shitgirls not leave us all alone?
Classmate? 2 years? Op how old are you.
Maybe she is interested to you in the beginning but you don't respon it.
I never have female friend except my ex because Going friend with girl is doesnt work and suffocating.
My advice: be Rude to her and make her hate you and go to another woman. She Will interested at you again work 9/11
Edit: my profile picture is anime so my opinion doesnt count
One random girl who doesn't give a flying fuck about you and you act like your world is ending. Get a grip you pleb man up and move on with life who the hell cares about some chick who didn't reciprocate your feelings for her?
She doesn't want a relationship(with you). She doesn't have time(to you). If she just barely making the minimal contact, she is just want your attention. Cutting her off is going to be difficult, but necessary. When she tries to communicate, totally ignoring her would be the most effective way, but as you two are classmates, you better just try to make the conversation as short as possible. You answer her, you don't ask about her. If she starts telling her bullsh*t anyway, you just give courteus nods, short answers and try to detach from the conversation, you can also simply tell her that you don't care. When she gets that, she will try few times putting you back in the always-available-guy box.
And just generally don't be always available to anyone. If you don't value your own time, noone will.
u just like a kid who fishing in the water that has no fish, like dogs waiting for bones with people who do not carry bones
leave her or u gonna be more hurt than that
I understand what you feel because I've felt what you felt before
u better find another love because there are still many women out there who still care about u and ur feeling
do something that will forget about her like dota
sorry my bad english :D
I'm in a similar situtation right now. I said some stuff I probably shouldn't have and she told me to never talk to her again. 2 weeks and I'm just chilling. It was difficult the first few days but when you realize that you are the most important person to yourself, you stop giving a shit.
well if you have some feelings then say what you feel to her in open way explain yourself if it will not work then just cut your relation or reduce somehow
I just woke up and my brain is still in the loading screen, so I didn't understand exactly what the situation is. Anyway from what I got I don't think she's ever seen you as a potential partner and she's probably not even interested in you as a person.
First of all you said you've been talking to her basically every day for a year and you're still not sure if something bad is happening in her life, which leads me to believe that your conversations revolve only around superficial things, that the two of you never got to know each other on a deeper level and that she doesn't open up to you about her personal stuff, after one year of nonstop talking. Not a good sign imo. You also said she started being weird, finding less and less time for you, that's a really bad sign. And she finds time for other people. Even worse sign.
There's a small, VERY SMALL chance she might have realized she likes you and doesn't know how to handle the whole thing, especially if the "relationships are suffucating" wasn't a dumb excuse and she really meant it, that's not likely at all but you never know in life.
I'm telling this as a girl and as a person who wasted a lot of time chasing and waiting for people: tell her you like her in the most direct way possible, get it off your chest and see what happens. If the answer is anything but "I like you too and I care about you" then just run away from her. Don't pretend you're fine with this situation and force yourself to live like this, 'cause if you were fine with it you wouldn't have written this post on a dota forum. And remember that whatever happens, often times changes are necessary and will make you happier than being stuck in a situation that hurts you but that you perceive as comfortable and familiar 'cause you got used to it.
if u been with her talking 1 yuear and not a single time hook up then u didnt even show anything nor didnt want to fuck her anytime so
i dont know what u expect to girl wait u 2 years to wake up and fuck her ofcourse she find some1 else to fuck with
Please sign in to post comments.
Okay I usually don't talk to girls because it's kinda difficult to keep up with them. I can but I don't want to, it has it's own disadvantages.
So unfortunately, somehow I got hooked up to one of my classmate girl. We've been talking almost daily for more than a year now. So guess what, the problem is: I'm attached.
Although I like her and she knows the fact, she says relationships are suffocating and I guess this is how she wanted to friend zone me even though she denies so. But anyways she said it doesn't matters and we could go on in a cool way. Okay, everything was good.
THE PROBLEM: Recently she has been behaving really weird. Although there is some shitty guy she sticks too a lot during college hours(because the groups were formed so), she would barely get time for me except texts(This shit hurts a lot). Recently she has been behaving really weird. Says difficult times although there isn't anything really difficult that I know of. She talks pretty much the same wat to others. Cutting her off seems really difficult at this stage. I need help with how should I proceed. Telling her won't really help cuz she knows pretty much what I've written.
Sorry for this long shit but I'm in some serious trouble since a month or two.
I need help. :(